More on spanking.... My son bit his cuz.?

Posted on Jan 08, 2009 under xn--zqqs84h3is.com | edit

I have received so many great responses on my first question. What happened was that my 5 year old was playing with something. When the toy fell out of his hands, his 8 yr old cousin lunged for it, knocking my son over and saying "well he let go of it.' In the scuffle that followed, my son bit his cuz on the rear. So I took the toy away, seperated the boys and gave my son a talking to about biting. My sis said she would have spanked him. My mom says no, because he was physically provoked. What do you think?

BTW.....I don't like spanking, but if my son ever INTENDED to cause physical or mental harm, i think that a spanking would be justified.

Your Mom is right. He was physically provoked. They need to learn to share, not get spanked for it.

yeah.. you did the right thing!! your a good father! your son's cousin should be old enough to share and understand that his cousin is only 5! and let him play with the toy he wants!!

i think you did the right thing , he was frustrated with what happened . did your sister have a word with her son for what he did ?

Provocation is not a legal defense against committing violence.
Only self defense warrents violence.

So it would greatly depend upon the exact nature of how this "scuffle" went down as to whether the child should be spanked. If he bit to because he was getting hurt in the scuffle, that could be seen as self defense. If it was truly just a scuffle and the reason for the bit was the provocation, then the bitting is not justified and the child deserves to be spanked.

So the bigger, older cousin knocked your son over and he responded in kind. Then he was scolded for protecting himself in the best way he knew how. Your explanation doesn't make reference for any real consequences to the cousin who knocked your child over. Are you trying to teach your child that he should never stand up for himself and that it's okay for people to treat him violently? My parents made that mistake with me and I was essentially a punching bag for a few years until I realized that, despite my parents lectures that I should never hit any one, I have a right to fight back when mistreated. I'm with your mom on this one and I think your sister should have gone ahead with some kind of strict discipline for her own son. That one needs to learn that looking out for someone smaller that himself is more important than grabbing a toy. The older child sounds like a brat to me and his mother wants your child to be punished for her son's poor behavior.

I believe in spankings, but not for this situation.

Some people consider it abuse, but seriously.. my parents were WHIPPED when they got in trouble. And they are civilized people!

Kids need to have discipline. And even though your son was physically provoked, he still needs to learn not to.. bite people's butts?

So, I don't think a spanking was necessary here. Good job. :)

It doesn't really matter if you spank him or give him a time out or a talking to as long as you make it clearn what he did was wrong. Your sisters kid (the cousin) should have gotten a talking to about theri behavior too....maybe your sister should open her eyes...and as for your mother...she is just plain wrong...resorting to violence expecially for minor things...making the excuse (I was provoked) is wrong...she should get her head out of the clouds.

LOL! That sounds like my last answer!

If your son responds to talking-tos, you lucked out. He didn't intend to hurt anyone. It's funny that they had a "scuffle" over a toy!

I would not have spanked him in that case, I think you made the right choice.

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More on spanking.... My son bit his cuz.?

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